One of the impacts of this very strange time is that so many of our habits, routines, and schedules just don’t work anymore. I am and have always been a morning person. Really, really, a morning person. My pre-COVID-19 habits and routines were focused on an early start and engaging with the world quickly. I was usually up at 5:30 am and off to the church as soon as possible.
Since being in quarantine, I find myself getting up later and spending time watching the latest news. Over the past weeks, several people I respect, and who have always offered wise counsel, have suggested that we might all be better off if we limit our contact with the 24-hour news cycle, especially the non-stop COVID-19 reports. Of course we should be informed and concerned, and there are plenty of spirit-lifting reports of good coming from the bad, but we probably need to carefully consider how all of this impacts us.
At the same time, I started noticing that I was beginning every day feeling anxious before my eyes were even all the way open. I was going through my new, isolation-created routines with growing anxiety and worry. By the time I felt “pulled together” enough to pray, I was already a mess, and found it hard to come to God and feel the peace and assurance the Holy Spirit brings to us in prayer.
So, I did something pretty drastic for me. I've started praying before I get out of bed, sometimes even before my eyes are completely open. If I can’t think of anything to say, I just sit in silence, knowing God hears my heart, and doesn’t care if I am “pulled together” when I pray. This prayer isn’t particularly original – I’ve seen versions of it in memes all over the internet. I don’t know where it originated, but here is my version.
So far I’ve done all right.
I haven’t been fearful,
or angry or frustrated,
But in a few minutes, God,
I’m going to get out of bed.
And from then on,
I’m going to need a lot more help.
Grace & Peace,